After spending the Friday with Asanagi, as usual, I didn’t take even a step outside of my house the following days and instead just spent the days lazing around until Monday eventually came.
Monday. The start of the week. A depressing day for most people in the world. Of course, that was the case for me too, but today especially, I felt more depressed than your average Joe.
“…Will it be okay…?”
I sighed at myself as the silhouette of the school, which was built on a small hill, came into my view.
I was sighing because of the event that occurred a few days back.
The event when I told Amami-san and her cronies off back at the arcade, well, it was more like me picking a fight with them. The more time passed the more embarrassed I got from remembering that event.
Seriously, what the hell was I doing?
Well, I’m eating my just desserts, of course. After all, I’ve been trying to stay out of trouble, yet I still said that one thing out loud, and completely invalidated everything that I’ve done.
‘…Sorry but, I don’t want to hang out with you guys.’
‘Ah, of course, I’m glad that Amami-san invited me, but, you see, I’m not big-hearted enough to hang out with a group of people who clearly dislike me.’“Ugh…”
That was embarrassing.
Why did I, a mere loner, go out my way to say those awful things?
“I will sour the class’ atmosphere the moment I step inside, I’m sure…”
I’m sure Asanagi will help me smooth things over with Amami-san, so I don’t think there will be any problem in that regard, but she wasn’t the only one I picked a fight with. That was the main source of the problem.
The moment I walked into the room, the people who had been happily grouping up stopped whatever they were doing at the moment and glared at me as if they were looking at trash. I could imagine such a scene.
If that were to happen, I would be completely isolated from the rest of the classroom.
Maybe I’m overthinking this, maybe nothing will actually happen. However, once my thoughts spiraled toward these negative thoughts, my loner mentality keep me there. The fact that I couldn’t consult anyone about this problem is just a cherry on top.
“Someone I could consult…”
I knew Asanagi had my back, my only friend. The only person other than my parents and myself whose number was recorded in my contact list.
I knew she would listen to me if I were to talk with her. She might tease me about it, but she was a serious person by nature, I could trust her completely in that regard.
However, I didn’t think that crying out to her was the right thing to do in this situation.
At school, everyone relied on her, Amami-san, the other classmates, and even our homeroom teacher relied on her. After all, her grades were excellent, her mannerisms were perfect and she was a perfect honor student.
However, Asanagi was only human. If she did all those things regularly, she would eventually get exhausted. Rather, it was because she was exhausted from dealing with those things that she came to me.
I shouldn’t try to add to her burden when she was supposed to relax around me.
In my opinion, your friends weren’t tools you could just conveniently use to make yourself feel better. That was why I decided not to burden Asanagi with my problem. I would only contact her to have fun.
…Well, that was an excuse. In the end, I just didn’t have the balls to contact her.
I whispered my greetings toward the P.E teacher in front of the school gate and immediately headed toward the classroom. My mood wasn’t the best today, so I arrived a little later than usual, right before the homeroom started. Most of my classmates had already arrived, save for a few.
I tried to erase my presence, but it seemed like no one was actually looking at me.
“Good morning, Maehara-kun. You’re a bit late today, huh?”
“Good morning… I overslept.”
I started my morning conversation with Ooyama-kun, like usual, there was nothing strange about it.
I guess I was overthinking things.
“U-Umm… Maehara-kun, do you have a moment?”
As soon as I sat down and took my textbook out of my bag, surprisingly, Amami-san approached and called out to me.
…I really didn’t see this coming.